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Showing posts with the label Jokes

Real Pressure - Performance appraisal

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It was a hot meeting at the office conference hall. All the people from the department had been called. The VP was looking much tensed. The mood was so bad. My friend asked me -"Hey, what is this meeting all about? I told - May be they will decide on when to have the next meeting. People around smiled at each other. Then the VP started talking. It was about the recent attrition rate that was so high. Around 10 people had put in their papers. All experienced guys. It was quarter end and so work was huge. If we do not complete the work on time, we need to be paying heavy penalty said the VP. The VP turned to the manager and told " Hey - take how much ever resources you want. Recruit or take them from other departments. But complete the work in another 25 days. Take people and complete it man . To this the sweet manager replied " Sir! Give me one wife and nine months and I shall show you results. Don't give me nine wives and one month. I cannot do anything...

Funniest one line Jokes

Ju dge: Why did you hit your husband with a chair?” Wife: “I couldn’t lift the table.” “What did one ghost say to another?” “Do you believe in people?” My friend has a fine watch dog. At any suspicious noise he wakes the dog and the dog begins to bark. They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak. “Room Service? Can you send up a towel?” “Please wait someone else is using it.” When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance. “Where did you get those big eyes?” “They came with the face.” I went alone on our honeymoon. My wife had already seen Niagara Falls. But the psychiatrist really helped me a lot. I would never answer the phone, because I was afraid. Now I answer it whether it rings or not. It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look !! “Look, guide, here are some lion tracks.” “Good. You see where they go and I’ll find out where they came from.” “Do you think I”ll lose my looks as I get ol...